Funny series:Surviving a horror movie

As a result of youtube and movie "The Ring", i had a strange dream that i watched a youtube video which will kills you in a week!!!. From that inspiration, i am proud to present you survival guide on "How to survive a horror movies/games" . I know there are lots of other llist of same category better than mine. I just made it for fun sake. enjoy :D..

Imagine you are watching a movie late night. Suddenly hands grow out of your TV and drag you into the movie. You know there is a homicidal killers, bloody monsters from hell, aliens, ghosts out here to taste your blood. These tips can probably prevent you from seeing yourself gutted out.

1.Be a girl: Now before anybody says im a cross-dresser, let me say im not. In most horror movies, the person who survives is probably a female. Being a female greatly increases your chances of survival, with all the males ready to sacrifice for you. And for God's sake, Don't just stand there staring your friends heart ripped apart. Run girl run!!!

2.Don't be a good guy or bad guy:It is a very possibility that good guys may die while protecting the lady. The bad guys are pretty much screwed up, with their "creations" going out of control ending up him/her being the first kill of the creature. if you did not make the creature, you will be killed when you are trying to rape the heroin. My advice, BE THE MONSTER!!!... you will definitely survive :p..

3.Detach from all emotional attachments:If you are lucky enough to survive most of the movie, you'll witness deaths of your loved ones. But its time to move on. If your girlfriend dies, you will get another in an about half an hour (Usually your gf's friend, villain's mom etc) so chill out dude!..

4.Be nice,not good:Don't tease animals, little boys and girls or elderly. Chances are that when they return as ghost, demon, mutant or something horrible, you are going to be killed before the rest. And mind your own business.

5.Check fuel level of your vehicle:The Last thing in the universe you'll wish for is an empty fuel tank of your vehicle in middle of no where. On top of that you are in a place where reports of mutilated bodies found, or an insane killer was last seen. If you have to go somewhere, check the TV or radio for any disturbing events and head the other way. Well, If you did screw up in middle of forest full of wolves howling, why not go back where you came from instead of camping. And never ever, EVER enter creepy old mansion up the hill.

6.Be superstitious: Mocking the rituals, not obeying old man/woman advice and opening something you were not supposed too is a sure way of getting killed in a horrifying manner. Do not be present anywhere near that place or person. If your friend is not superstitious better avoid them too as they will end up doing weird things and you as their friend, will have to pray price too. Get out of the town, change your name, get a new face, get a new job, get a new life.

7.Ancestors Blessing: Unless you are ABSOLUTELY sure that your ancestors killed the bad guys each time, DO NOT FIGHT with it, even if you have the only weapon which could kill him/her/it. Ultimately you will be killed, and the hero( Whose ancestors kicked butts every time) of the movie yoink your weapon, kills it and finally kisses the heroin. got it?

8.Stay away from dolls: Dolls are creepy and attract demons/spirits. steer away from them.

9.Don't be greedy: Think you are in a treasury of some ancient king/shaman/witch who came back to life. It does not matter whether you are with good or bad guys. When the hero kills the nemesis, the whole building will eventually start to collapse/ Only portal way back home was closing all the way through battle. In such scenarios it is not wise filling your gold coins, buckets or whatever. Just get the hell out. Chances are that you will be buried underground/ left as a snack for the wild beasts.

10.Don't have a crush on heroine/Be her ex:PREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING AT ALL COSTS!!!!.... especially if hero is still alive, you MUST die. You will be far more stupid to save your girl from whatever harming her and you get killed in action, forcing you to let her "in arms" of the main hero. if you MUST have crush, choose heroine's friend. Though it won't guarantee that you will be alive, it does not mean that you have to die. Most films only have supporting actor's/actress's gf/bf killed.

Thanks for reading. Please please comment whether you liked the list or not. If not, Check under your bed at 3:00 am. ha ha ha.... have fun folks :)n

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